just....

time have past~

quite long time i dint in this blog... well..

Passion~ 激情~~

Quite long time i dint write or update for a new post since the last post.... haha just the same old me .... lazy and slow poke... and sometimes just my feeling get buried and i try not to think about it... so in the end i just don't know what to write ... XD
Well.... but sometimes still will float to the surface and drag your memory back....

I was so hope that was me... those who could fulfill their dream, chase their dream and their passion grow and just follow.... i wish i could just follow too ....
Too bad i'm not in some countries that are so advance, free, no district and everything almost everything can be achieve...

Passion in me, i do struggle and fight for my dream and try to untie my fate that had kept and wrap me for a long time.... i had tried so hard until i get hurt so badly in deep, in the end still i can't achieve a single things... If so i do succeed in twisting my fate i still need money to support me, because today's world everything are about money....
I just wish to study abroad, i know many do wanna study abroad to those country that they dream since was small.... just like me tie up... Maybe like Japan or USA, could be a dancer, designer in animation or manga(comic) or maybe game.... etc...

Sit down alone in a room and reflect yourself from the miror or just plain white wall and recall back the passion, memory that had been buried where we can't achieve due to some situation, condition....

Firework in us just cannot spark well....
Passion, PASSION did not burnt and feel so restless.... Was so enthusiastic before, was so full of passion before, so naive and dream for it... Maybe that time so naive?
Nope i don't think so dream is a naive... Dream, Hope, Passion are those for me to fight for... sometimes we will feel so lost......

Where i had been ????? The road to take???

Just like bird trap in a cage or fish trap in fish tank~ Will lead us to wrong way, Maybe..... Maybe only just a dream?
Just hope one day passion still burnt~

黑

其实人的过去很重要吗？？？
为了要了解他/她，你最挚爱的人，一定要吗？？？这样才不会让人骂你了解我多少？？？？

对每个人而言当然有不同看法,我呢我觉得是的.....
当然目前为止我没去真正了解一个人，如果是朋友相处久了只然而然会懂.
我从来没喜欢过一个人,没有感觉说那么很疯狂的想拿个人的来历...别问为什么，我都抓摸不到自己是什么？？我到底想要什么？？？我有时问什么，我是为什么.....
我不会跟人说我的痛处...可能....想让一个真正了解我的人来了解吧~~！！！也不想让人抓我的把柄...

可能看到我的部落格的人会知道吧...我的黑暗....差一点就要消失在黑暗里头....
当在最黑暗,被黑暗覆盖,将会看到一线光芒,可我的光芒是家人....不是他们的安慰，而是我想如果我的后果是那样肯定很多人会为我而悲伤,担心....

人是脆弱的...需要别人来帮忙...憋着,一个人跟伤,痛,黑暗走过来是非常的辛苦...自杀可能是第一个念头吧！！！
我们是我们，我们不是别人，做回自己...而我们也不懂他人的思想...

一个人,夜晚,角落,哭着,悲哀,谁知？
早上,另一个人,带着笑,谁又知晚上悲哀的夜晚的性格....

有些人想平平安安的渡过...可我觉得我好不充实,人生,出生,读书,做工,退休.....的旋律....好寂寞...
很想做轰轰烈烈的自己很想要的事...不幸不行,为什么,世界都是讲钱.....
没钱没得商量...
我不晓得寂寞人让人孕育出不同思想还是什么...可我只觉得...应该是空虚吧....

hahaha.... 'blush'

... quite a long time i dint write blog... i forgot about it... lol... i am so so so promise broker...~_~

Error....

sorry about those grammatical error forgot to edit....... haha.... and quite sometimes i dint write my blog... lazy... too lazy ><

love....

what is partner?? partner can be defined as many terms like dancing partner, working partner , group partner, and boyfriend or girlfriend....
Love is just a part of our life... and thier end would lead to many ways...
sad ending, happy ending, die, Aids, real love, and etc...
i found out this video...


but i hate da video music.....

and here da post i found it is meaningful...
http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=398434162718&id=100000122937230&ref=mf

你和别人做一次爱的时间我要流多少血？
我推开他的房门
看到他正和一个女孩在床上
我稍稍一楞 马上说：“我在客厅等你.”于是我为他们这对狗男女关好了门
坐在客厅的一角 打开电视
女孩的包放在那 我随手打开
翻出一把修眉的刀片 很精致 很锋利
在我家从来见不到锋利的东西
因为我对它们有情结
而今天它就在我手上
我怎么会不去和它亲近
我那么爱它 爱它给我的感觉
手腕上总有突突跳的一处
象里面藏了个古怪的小动物
它想跳出来 于是
我用我热爱的锋利的刀片帮助了它
也帮助了自己 原来血流的速度可以这么快
我从容的点了支烟
继续看电视．一个男人对一个女人说＂我爱你
可是我不能和你在一起
我不能每天活在负罪感中．
＂**妈，扯什么蛋
男人真他妈自私 真他妈虚伪 真他妈懦弱
来世我要是男人 我爱谁就一定和谁在一起
无论怎样都不分开 除非 除非有一天不爱了


我的头越来越晕
电视里的狗男女唠唠叨叨说个没完
屋里的狗男女哼哼哈哈没结束
他在这方面的能力我是非常佩服的
控制力相当的出色
正当我胡思乱想的时候
那女的出来了 看到地板上的血尖叫了一声
他连内裤都来不及穿跑出来摇晃我
他说＂你这个傻女人，你至于这样吗？＂
我咧开嘴 想笑


背叛是肮脏 无耻的 可背叛又是正常的
因为人的天性里就有背叛的成分
很早以前就有一个关于人类的传说
传说人类最早是双性人
两个脑袋 四个胳膊 四条腿
因为背叛了上帝
所以上帝一怒之下把所有的人类都劈成了两半
从此才有了男人和女人
这以后 每个人都在寻找自己的另一半
找到之后又要背叛他 伤害他
其实伤害的是自己
因为很早很早以前你们是一个人 是一体的
人类就是这样 不停的背叛自己的爱人
不停的背叛自己这是一个诅咒 一切都源于人类对上帝的背叛



他坐在我的病床前在不停的说着
或许是在解释什么 我听不清楚
我的思绪不在他身上
我一直在使劲想有关人性这个问题


我出院的时候手腕上还缠着纱布
雪白雪白的 被阳光照上去 变的刺眼
我直接回了自己的住处收拾东西
我想我该离开了
我要去一个我原本应该在的地方
他来找我说：＂宝贝 你别走
你知道我爱你
我和那个女的只是玩玩的．＂
我看着他的眼睛 里面有一丝焦急
我想 那可能是真的
我用轻松的口气学周星星＜回魂夜＞里的台词：
＂你那么喜欢玩你自己玩吧 压力太大 我不玩啦＂


我给他的卡片上写着：
当你电话响起时你会把手伸进口袋
拿到电话的那一刻你会看到我最后给你留下的话
首先 我告诉你
我自杀不是想让你内疚让你后悔让你反省
我只是想知道你和别的女人做一次爱的时间
我能流多少血 现在我知道了 是1000cc
我爱你 所以我不会再和你待在一块
因为我无法忍受你对我也是对你自己的背叛
我觉得肮脏恶心 占有欲是人的共性
我也是一样的 你不会再找到我
我会在中途下车 然后去一个我应该去的地方
你不会知道那是哪
手机上有三个未接电话是吗？
那是我最后一次对你说我爱你。

hope u guys know how to read chinese...

so does love means so important to all of us??? well i think that answer maybe yes...
well as i know some cant be single in thier status... at least must have GF or BF just because they get the inlove feeling
and do love meant make love??? no of course... so please if u want to do that kind of things can... but at least with your GF under protected sex... well i not came here to support and agree unmarried sex.... well at least done thier best...
Isit so hard to become single... well maybe for some... but for me... I don't think so... i have been alone, single for 19 years... well i can said that it feel lonely sometimes when u cant find someone to talk with when alone... at least we got friends to cheers with... I'm a guy but maybe not that kind of guy go tackle girls... i means like express your feeling to her, but maybe i will consider girl come to express thier feeling to me..XD haha.. joking ><..... but before that i make it clear i will if i met someone that enough to move my heart.... cause sometimes love is blind and colourfull....
so what ??? I'm single and i declare that easy to stay alone... if never been inlove b4... but still when harsh time... u cant find someone to complain, release your words in your heart... but me never open my door to my friends... or best friends, pals.... well no offence... cause i just feel not to do so.... dont know why...
Maybe in future i will meet someone ....

P/S if u cant understand those chinese word tell me... i will try and translate...

Contentment...

Please look well to the world... the world is changing...
but one thing that doesn't change is the condition of some place in africa...
what's the matter??? the matter they are poor, drinking unclean water from river that caused worm born under thier skin, no electric... and etc so human only want to be live well of course not living in poverty...
i watch this video on facebook... well indeed that his sound great and really kinda touch....



Oh come on... please be contentment... why there are still some ppl dont know how to stop complaining ... well of course i know that some place, something it is worth to complaining like country, attitude and behave....
look the video... yet still many ppl waitting and wanting us to lend a hand for them... and do they complain that they don't live well or why thier life is just like a worm.... maybe not or maybe yes.... but me as well sometimes still complaining... but i try...

kinda awkward...

er... exam over... and i need a little time to write da blog, well you know i mean to continue update new post... so in few days ...maybe...
Lazy and feeling stopping me from writting... >_<||

late time post....

haha.... quite sometimes i dint post a new update.... well you know i kinda lazy and now exam... after exam for da update.... >.<... feel sorry about it....

Tee Hee... =.=

to be continue.....

out of idea

World

time past fast and feel like kinda long time i dint walk through or touch anything in here... time pass, couldn't stop it cause it one of the natural phenomena... we cant buy time mean while the time does it can buy our everything....basicaly like time, then age and everything that pass over or along ...
our age, time, bloom or youth and we get older, older and older... maybe your look just fine and did not change or maybe ppl keep saying wow look so young... do you think so??? nop everything inside you are getting older every second pass and your experienced increase in everday life especialy those keep travel and could see many things that pass infront of thier eyes...

Today's worlds are changing... not some particular things, the things that changed are everything that we see, seen, or saw...
First example like some of guys wearing girl style dresses, but i admit some of them are so suit them... girls too wearing guys dresses... well the world fashion maybe are turning upsidedown...but the sense are still there...
like nature this few year....
disaster happend...
prevent usage plastic and instead get used of recycle bag to supermarket or shopping when need it...
i know alone, oneself power not enough to change the world but if one do not start and who are going to start???

Exam... again...

welll.... my 2nd sem ending soon... so exam is neede in order to complete my 2nd sem studies.... and... u know.. kinda lazy and nothing inspire me to write blog.. ><
sorry about that eh..

why???I dont know....

Actually i was thinking that do we have option to choose??? yes we do have sometimes, but sometimes we don't have, because the path we were taken were decide...
maybe it just like after some finish form 6 and conitue thier study for Public university but one's who join in they cannot choose what they wanted to study...
well it doesn't seems so in private school as well... why? cause it decide by parents and wealth problem...
So it doesn't matter what road we are choosing or not the path we want we still need to continue to walk, we dont have other choices to choose and only a dead end if you wanted to walk a different road or else you knock down the wall and that time you going to change fate.......

My feeling and my thoughts are so waver these few day....
Why???? i dont know.... but some of my friends that i feeling just like hidding the something from me and maybe scare me.... who know??? only he know or he tell others???instead of me???
I am the type who easily get affected and waver just only a little something not quite big deal... but i will mind and keep thinking it why, why and why???
Althought I do have many friends but still I dont have a friends do real listen to what my heart is talking about...
You know we usually don't show something inside to others so easily so it depends what happen to them when they are just not so dare to open thier door and welcome you to understand him or her....

Many memory flow through....
Happy,normal,strange,funny,normal,confused,furious and many more, but as for some the most important are sad... once a emotion that hurt and make you sad, you will going to remember it or else it just not too sad, well you know....
Sad just like a a nail fix on your heart and it's hard to get it out....
I am one of those, i will never forget what happen as my own principle...
For me, that making me just so down and a little frustrated about are the friendship...
Why? maybe they dont trust me, hidding something from me, scare me and not dare to tell me why they scare me, speaks to me... or bla bla bla....well... i dont know...

I am just like thin white lining... although I do seems like strong that will not going affect much, still do you know what am I thinking inside???... you will going to feel tired and so unstable.Please...

1 more things......
so tired these few weeks..... waver feeling... 2 presentation.. 2 assignment.. 2 coursework test... and assignment I need to double up the job.... Anyone can help me???

(sorry for da broken english)

a Lot of things happen.....

How am i going to say..... but,
first haha... quite sometime i dint update my blog cause a lot of things happen...
education stuff lo.... oh gosh..... i still need to pass up 3 assignment and sit for 2 test next week... and last week i just finish my group dicussion....

to be continue..... XD

hehe...

hehe... kinda long time no write this blog ..... well as usual lazy .... so mayb will postponed to more later....>< sorry....

Over....

Hoho.... exam over lo.... thats why i no wrrite blog quite a time lo.... but i also dont have the inspire to write my blog... no idea what to write.....

now the exam over sure happy... but when the result come out dont know what will happen untill then... my exam over on the 14 september... the next day ... i went sing k with my friends...
no picture available cause forget to take picture... haiz....
den we accompany loon go shooping lo.... he buy a pair a shoe lo...
after shopping go home.... man we by bus go home... from SW to Wangsa... on the bus 1 and a half hour.... slow, long, boring.... dont know what to do except talking and looking out the windows...
untill here lo.... just for update some new story.... dont know what to write... ><

times... gone.....

Time goin fas..... but i should say that fast.... cause we are living 1 second per 1 second.... so we human are like this... when the past and the times past over we do say fast.... well it does fast......

Since steps in Tarcollege from now do alot of things happen....... and well now goin to finish up first semester.... goin to exam soon....... haiz........so guys... not only in tarcollege.... of coursee do well in exam to ensure a good result........ keep up the good work.... ganbateh........

well ... u know i goin to exam soon not writing so much things... + now lazy to write.... after exam i goin to edit photo to post up.....

很快...Gone so fast...

Wow ... last saturday, 22nd August 2009 my Tar College dance competition was over.... man i fast enough , before the competition was keep thinking .... oh man .... den now its over i am still thinking it was so fast.........
有时候我觉得时间很可怕，过的快，所流失的一切已成为历史....不能再从来，就算能也好岁月也是不能改变.....害怕时间的流逝....
time flows too fast.... terrified... days per days... old days per days.....
so we need to fight with tim enot wasting time... at least doin something when the times flow....

Those dance competition was fun and nice., damn high man... i capture some others group video as well.. well i just post mine of course... lazy to post other.... maybe in other days when i available.....
i just feel like goin 1 more time again.... haiz... hope here do have dance school....
可惜没有....我很多东西没办法实现.....

here are my video.....
MY dance crew, hip-hop dance...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lx2ee9elpOs

MY dance crew latin dance...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2WFlqVeNEmQ

My dance crew, indian dance...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v1jgVJS4Xmg


of course our dance not so well... we din't win.... haiz.... but nevermind is was enjoy afterall.... 最重要享受，体会过程.....
well.... u know....

unknown mixture.......

well, the world , also known as the stage....
the fate do call upon us when we goin to spilt the way and choose it...
but isit fate call upon us???
hmm.... not sure !!! why??? cause sometimes does the fate reallt isit a fate???
sometimes i does feel so so so miserable...
fate, haha fooling me before... thought so i can change it, but yet i really does thought so i can change it to a better??? ha.... well... i still stick on my own road....own path thats is decide to walk on me, decide by my fate, my parents or maybe sake of me... haha who knows....
maybe just a matter of times... we do can discover what the fate is....
althought i lose is... but at least i dont regret cause i have tried my best to make it to change... because sometimes fate is indefinite maybe also is definite as well....
dont surrender remember, for me maybe surrender like just betrayed yr own and your own soul... like thos who suicide...
see the world todays.... there are still many thats live so poor so stress and so pity, there are still walking on this planet todays... they are still living on... so do u so fas to commit suicide is so irresponsible and it cannot help to solve anything.... those who are not working like they are scrouge at the road side, they are still on thier foot for beg ... at least better those who steal....

well well well... why do i feel so miserable cause sometimes feel so so so lost.......
haha..... many question that i cant find the answer out of my mine or maybe from somewhere else...
haiz....why mine feeling is so complicated,dont knows...
anyone can tell me who do human live for???
so u know, many answer can come out but i dont know isit the answr that what i want, what i find...so many different people in the world, million and billion and more thought from brain are different... answer, every one own self answer of course will do for them to keep live on maybe... maybe some not need.....
some 1 things sometimes this come out from my mind... human live for suffer so in the path to rehab den maybe become mother nature~
and whr the mother natured come from???
religious all made by man ... maybe just only gods knows....

I'm of course still single now... sometimes watching those couple oh damn.... so so so sweet quite envy and jealous them... haha dont know.... maybe just matter of time as well...
i know thr are still many friends and people single just like me from the days that he or she born....
but still many of my friends saying thats girlfriends/boyfriends do really bring trouble to them...so why u still wanna be with he or she??? haha.... isit so trouble??? yeah right!!! of course sometimes thats in love also is a kind of extra feelings maybe that so u cant describe...well for me single or couple both also have its advantages and disadvantages...